first week a go-go

Alrighty, first week of classes: properly prepped for my lab, participated in class, turned in whatever needed to be turned in.  

70% recuperation

I've spent the first two days of vacation, dozing off for 12+ hours and consuming soba by the bundles.  At this rate, I will be able to continue my mile training by Tuesday. 

   

march comes in like a lion and out like a lamb

Tomorrow, I'll be reviewing for my last final exam of winter quarter.  Even with this cold, I'll be consuming enough tea and red bull to be in high spirits.  

In unrelated news, I ordered a mala bracelet made out of bodhi seeds, with self-peace and zen in mind.  Well, it has already been nineteen days since I placed the order, but I can't just email the monastery, 'Oi, quit yer meditating and send me my freakin' mala already', that just doesn't bode well.  

here's the big 'un

To my profs and school chums looking for my ePortfolio, --> click here! <--

sweet, saccharine success!

Finished!  I'm one productive panda bear, complete with baggy, dark panda eyes. (which will keep me single and unloved, regardless)  It is time to unhook the coffee drip IV.  

I'm looking forward to tomorrow with Christmas-anticipation.   

blog 03 assignment: vegetarian, humanitarian

A Filipino vegetarian is unheard of. (it's almost like an urban myth) The majority of our traditional dishes are meat based: Kare-kare (ox-tail), balut (duck fetus), dinuguan (blood stew).  In fact, the few vegetarian restaurants that exist in the Philippines are owned by Buddhists.  

As a tot, my parents tried to trigger my carnivore tendencies by slipping in a slab of pork or beef in my veggie platter.  Over the years, they've given up on this (futile) endeavor.  I don't attribute my vegetarianism to animal-rights or religious beliefs.  I just didn't like the taste.  This boggled just about everyone, not just my parents.  

My last trip to the Philippines was about 10 years ago, summer of '97.  It was my 10th year birthday celebration, the whole block of the neighborhood was decked out in streamers, everyone was invited.  Various dishes were lined up side by side: multi-colored sticky rice cakes, skewered meats marinated with sweet sauce, and Lechon (roasted pig) in the center.  The only vegetable-based dished was coated in a salty shrimp paste.

I sat rooted to the main table with an empty plate in front of me.  Unknowingly, this caused my parents to loose face in front of the invitees.  Abstaining from eating during a celebration can be interpreted as condescension.  Later, I was reprimanded in front of the guests, by my parents.    

Years later, I was told that most of the people invited to the party were street kids and low income families.  I asked my mum, "If you knew that, why not order at least a vegetarian dish, as well?"

"How many impoverished vegetarians do you know?"     

gung-ho little fish

This week is the tipping point for the quarter: an essay, a mid-exam, field report and book report. One slip up and, well, it's going to be messy. In lieu of that, I installed LeechBlock, a self-banning Firefox-add-on for net-procrastinators. (such as yours-truly) In addition, I'm breaking my hiatus on caffeine and will be chugging the stuff till Friday. How much more will I be willing to compromise, I wonder.

nom nom nom: a food post

<-- Happy consumer

I went to Seattle with my family, during the weekend following Chinese New Year.  The Uwajimaya grocery was packed more than usual, it was tighter than an economy class seating.  Oh, but I had fun!  Going to Uwajimaya is the closest thing I have to a family past-time.  Even today, I still retain that childish glee from grocery shopping.  (see smiling mug shot)   

It was a good haul: economy sized bottles of Kirin Milk Tea, Maki Sushi (unfortunately, it's gone now), Hiroshima Manju, seasonal Meltyblend (matcha flavored!), buckwheat soba noodles, naval oranges (the size of two fists), Kusanagi milk sweets and other food stuffs. (geh, I can't believe I forgot to buy tea yokan and onigiri.  I'm an idiot)  The scroll of paper I'm holding was done by a very patient calligraphy master.  Dedicating ones life towards the perfection of one thing is truly admirable.   

community college is a community - ode to EVCC

My fifteen year old self would disown me (if that is even possible) if she knew I was attending a community college.  She wanted to attend MIT, of all places, and study nuclear engineering, of all things.  Like many wide-eyed, ambitious high schoolers, I held the assumption that community colleges were diluted versions of big-wig universities.  Later on, I found out that assumption only held true in terms of tuition cost.  Because of the smaller class sizes, community colleges don't make you feel anonymous. (it gets lonely in a room of 400 people)  The lack of anonymity is what puts the 'community' in community college.  

The college setting, in general, encourages others to act interdependently, a quid pro quo.   Acting interdependently, breaks away from the 'man-is-an-island-unto-himself' mentality that I've built up from my uneventful adolescence.  As the quarter progresses, I've interacted and exchanged insights with a variety of people who sincerely wanted to get something meaningful out of the class.  Performing intrinsically is refreshing. (especially when I'm not being coerced into it)  

Individual circumstances and interests have always clashed with this particular community.  If the course isn't in a year long sequence, at the end of the quarter, that campy cohesion I had during study groups is whittled down to a few tactful nods and waves in a narrow hallway.  I understand that everyone has their own agenda.  I mean, I can't expect an esprit de corp equivalent to the symbiotic relationship between the clownfish and its sea anemone.   

 

Regardless of how finite this community is, I'm glad to have been a part of it.  I've learned invaluable lessons that could not have been accomplished from reclusive contemplation. I can see myself looking back fondly at these past quarters as money well spent. (for once)

film rant 003: look what science has done!

Armageddon

I don't own any Criterion DVDs. (until I sell my kidneys)  For those of us who don't know what a Criterion DVD is, that's alright, that means you're normal.  A Criterion DVD is the movie industry's equivalent of literature's Everyman's Library. (the politically incorrect bastards that they are)  Every once-in-a-while, a DVD from the past or the contemporary present is given special treatment for being 'groundbreaking', 'provoking', 'timeless'.  Remastered audio and visuals, trailers, new commentary, and a mini-book detailing why this film is considered orgasmically good.  In short, it's a snobbery-fest. (the best berry festival ever)

Of all the brilliant films, why does Armageddon make the cut for the Criterion team? We all know what Armageddon is about and we can all agree that Willis delivers the same performance in all of the films he has participated in. (juxtaposed with Meg Ryan's movie career of easy going yuppies)  Honestly, I enjoyed this film: I bought the Armageddon themed candy, I held back the sniffles when *spoiler* Willis died *end spoiler*, to this day, I still play 'I Don't Want To Miss A Thing' in spite of my sexual organs atrophying from lack of use.  Perhaps, I don't find the idea of some pop culture rogue invading the Criterion tea party, of Jeremy-Iron sound-alikes, very appealing. 

   

Matrix Trilogy

The Matrix was fun, the first of the three times.  After the first film, the latter two, break away from the philosophical paranoia that made it famous and opted for the unnecessary action sequences. (that by now, any high budget film can emulate)  By the time the third film, Revolutions, rolled around in theaters, nobody really gave a damn. 

Sci-Fi is a dying genre.  Any Sci-Fi film of yester-year would be considered obsolete compared to a Nova documentary covering the latest scientific advancement.   That's understandable considering the progress we've made in the past few years: growing human ears on lab rats, RFID tagging, nanotechnology, stem cells, genome modification.

Taking into account, how much bad karma humanity has accumulated, since the time we've attained a higher cognitive ability, a robot apocalypse is only fair.  In that case, we need a tough-talking super genius with a heart of gold, or Keanu Reeves, to save us all.

film rant 002: I want my epiphany back

Closer

Recently, it has been an ongoing trend, romantic films with unrealistic dialogue.  Whether its purpose is to embellish an otherwise lackluster relationship or the screenwriter's nonexistent sexual prowess, this genre of film never fails to capture to capture the heart of the local Starbucks patron. (aka those who have acclimated to sugary, faux-coffee.  Caramel Macchiato with 95% childish-teeth-rotting delight and 5% coffee)

Couple Nietzsche's cynicism and Jane Austin's eloquence, and you will have their constipated love child, 'Closer'.  'Closer' whose only legitimate cinematic accomplishment is successfully executing the world's first yuppie-quartet-orgy, is the spiritual god of this lot.  Dialogue such as 'Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off, but it's better if you do' or 'What's so great about the truth? The truth hurts people - try lying for a change.  It's the currency of the world' is peppered throughout the movie.  By movie's end, as a sort of mutual consolation prize between movie maker and disappointed film goer, the viewer is treated to Portman bouncing about in a tighter-than-British/American-Blair/Bush-foreign-policy tanktop.  

Fight Club

Critics who nitpick 'Schindler's List' for story pacing/character portrayal/lack of Nazi sympathy etc.  Casual viewers who watch 'American History X' and admire Norton's chest tattoos.  What do the two have in common?  Those viewers have missed the point.  To be specific, they haven't 'missed' the point, instead they followed a bloody, xenophobic tangent Goebbels would be proud of.  

Fight Club has a different premise: how someone can assert themselves in a materialistic world.  (though, I'm unsure if sparring with a half-naked Brad Pitt is enough to induce any epiphanies)  There was one particular scene, I refer to, in order to convince someone this is not another veiled-homoerotic man film: a convenience store owner is confronted with a gun to the back of his skull.  Tyler Durden threatens to kill the clerk if he fails to pursue his ambitions of becoming a vet.  The clerk is let go, nameless Narrator, played by Norton, reprimands Tyler.  Tyler rationalizes his actions, 'Imagine how he feels.  Tomorrow will be the most beautiful day in [his] life.  His breakfast will taste better than any meal you and I have ever tasted.'

An uncomfortable amount of viewers take the extremities into context like a religious fundamentalist.  Dodgy, diluted varieties of fight clubs appear around the nation, chauvinism spreads akin to an Ebola epidemic.  I'm not a hardcore specialist in Tyler's dogma. (I, who lacks the Y chromosome) Albeit, if you consider playing shooters on your Xbox360 whilst eating a bag of Cheetos a form of asserting yourself, to each his own.  

film rant 001: makes me love the world again

Last Life in the Universe

Directed by Pen-Ek Ratanaruang.  We're introduced to an obsessive compulsive, librarian named Kenji, who resides in Thailand.  Then there's Noi, a Thai native and a quixotic woman of questionable nature.  The two meet & they interact through broken versions of the opposite's language (Kenji's Japanese speak versus Noi's Thai speak) and simplified English.  It's a very conventional premise, Hollywood's over-milked genre, two opposites gravitating towards one another.  Pen-Ek Ratanaruang conveys that element in such a surreal way, you'll wonder why he's not more widely known.  Cinematography is done by Christopher Doyle; anything his camera touches becomes ethereal. (and sexy)

The Fountain

I've been familiar with Darren Aronofsky's work since his first film, Pi.  (Pi came 

prior to another mainstream Hollywood film that also included schizophrenic mathematicians)  His next film, Requiem for a Dream, became a cult classic and my personal 1.5 hr reminder of why I'm glad I've never taken drugs. (but have known to write drug-induced sounding rant)

Mid 2006, the trailers peppered the net with its visual eye-candy and an assumed premise of either time-travel or immortality.  On the 4th of December, that same year, (it was colder than penguin nipples) I purchased my tickets and entered an almost-empty screening room. (3 of the 5 being film bouncers)  

What's the film like?  Just look at the poster!  Look at it!  I'm not an expert on aesthetics, I can't explain why this appeals to me.  But, believe me when I say this: if my tear ducts were still functioning, I would've been crying manly tears. 

It's an artsy film.  When I mean artsy, I don't mean take-a-shit-on-the-canvas-and-call-it-art artsy.  If you enjoyed the eclectic nature of Tarantino's 'Pulp Fiction', Wong Kar Wai-esque cinematography and Camus existentialism, I still won't guarantee that you'll enjoy this film.  Too Hollywood to be considered art-house, too art-house to be considered Hollywood.  I love this film, just the same.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aronofsky is currently working on a wrestling film staring Nicholas Cage.  I believe in the guy's talent, I mean, it's there.  I just have to stop my mind from screaming SELLOUT.  Oh darn it.

the modern denial of human nature

Turn on the bright-lights and steep a bag of tea, little fish is gonna pull off her first and last all-nighter of the quarter!  Experimental techno is going to be blasting the speakers, till I finish this little bugger of an essay.  Remember this moment, every time you have an inclination to go net surfing on a can of Monster, you incompetent, attention-deficient fool.  Never again.

in observance for the King

I claim to take the moral high ground.  But, really, it's nothing compared to the risk-takers, humanitarians, the real rebels for a cause: Aung San Suu Kyi, Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, the King himself, just to name a few.  These individuals, whose words are backed up by their actions, make me proud to call myself human.

In contrast, as a species, we're also capable of doing terrible, irreversible things.  Genocide, rape, corruption, murder, apartheid,the decision to remain ignorant and apathetic of others.  Americans to the Natives.  Spanish to the Mayans and Incas.  Japanese to the Ainu.  Australians to the Aborigines.  Chinese to the Tibetans.  Greeks to the Turks.  The individuals that were involved were not psychopaths.  During many war trials, the same people claim to have been following orders.  Think back on Milgram's experiment.  In order to have order, we have to have people who can follow orders.  However, where do we draw the line, in terms of civil obedience?    

I am one of the many bloggers.  I say clever things, in the comfort of my home, through the anonymity of the internet.  In person, I'm reserved and I keep to myself, a borderline recluse.  I'm tact with others in order to avoid conflict or uncomfortable situations.  I know it's impossible to rationalize an irrational world so I don't.  It's futile to worry about things I have no control of so I don't.  I nuke up a cup of coffee, tend to my pool laps and studies, then call it a day.  I'm selfish, my ambitions have yet to take a back seat. However, I won't slap a bumper sticker on my car, toss chunk change in a can and call it being a humanitarian.  

I raise my mug to you, King! 

Little Fish's recipe for increased productivity

4 whole-wheat pita bread

1 container of high end hummus

2 cucumbers

Toast bread.  Slice cucumbers.  Crack open the pita bread and coat the insides with generous amounts of hummus.  Stuff in the cucumbers. Fin.

To be consumed within 10 hours swimming and studying.  

Pros: Cheap, easy to make, doesn't turn into watery mush when jammed into a school bag.  Good for wet and dry seasons.  Can be used to ward off fast food cravings and amiable party invitations.  

Cons: High risk of OD-ing.  Loose the capacity to love.  

a wallet story: a freudian field-day or keeper of stuff

Hello. My name is Fossil, or at least that's what the tag says.  I know wallets can't talk, but please make me an exception.  I'm one of those cheap off-brand wallets, you know, with the so called 'genuine leather' and the sprayed on meaty musk. The usual clientele would be grade-school boys, over-eager to act adult so they purchase manly wallets of my caliber. Well, imagine my surprised when I was purchased and fitted with a driver's license that belonged to a 16 year old female! (the other Fossils are probably having a good laugh with this)

I'm four years old (that's 16 in wallet-years) now and my owner is currently 20 years of age. I've seen a lot of receipts, discarded membership cards, in my day. From my current contents, I was able to compile information about my owner: Her name is Pauline and judging from her last name, she is of Hispanic origin. She is enrolled at the Everett Community College, though I can't be sure of how many quarters she has taken. After comparing her earliest and more recent physical statistics, I found out that she is a recent victim of the 'Freshman 15' phenomenon. (jumping from 105 to 120lbs *ouch*) However, equipped with a membership card to a gym & aquatics center, I'm sure she's planning on reversing it. There's a bunch of expired/obsolete cards in here, as well; frequent buyer cards for various bookstores and video game shops and a crumpled sushi points card. With college, I doubt she has the time or the finances for costly hobbies or interests. (the gasoline gift-card signed 'From Mom', the 4 one dollar bills and the lone debit card, prove my point)

Proud of my sleuthing, I relayed my findings to my owner.

“Oh, Fossil, while all of that is true, there's a lot more to me than being profiled as a starving college student.”

“Really?” I, Fossil the $8 wallet, was taken-aback.

“Really. For example, I'm actually a very deep person who values self-introspection, yoga, existentialism and Jamba Juice. Plus, I have long term ambitions I'm committed to which include traveling the world and doing genome research.”

“Cool!” I exclaim in awe.

“I doubt what we own is an accurate indicator of who we are, even though there are people who believe that what they own defines them. Remember this, Fossil, even if you know the contents of someone's credit card, it's useless without their pin number.”

“What?!” I almost did a double-take.

“I mean, even if you know the contents of someone's wallet, you're only profiling them on a superficial level,” she corrected.

“Oh... Um, anything else I need to know?”

“I bet you never would have guessed that I was vegetarian,” she grinned.

“Wouldn't that be hypocritical, since I'm leather?” I half pondered, half questioned.

“Er, um, but alas the damage to those poor cows have been dealt, that bit can't be reversed. Gotta live in the present, right, Fossil?”

“I guess,” I agreed half-heartedly.

“Anyways, please don't talk to me in public. I don't have anything against wallets, Fossil, but other people are beginning to stare.”

we're a generation who love time-lapse videos

Sometimes when I have nothing to do, (like right now) I have these romanticized ideas of grandeur.  Don't laugh, (if you do, laugh with me) because I'm going to tell you: I want to become a genome researcher.  (more specifically: A sexy, young researcher with abs of steel, disco lasers and a go-get-'em attitude)  For me, this is an improvement.  Two or three months ago, I would have said my life was an interactive montage of failure.  

If that becomes a movie premise, it will win Palm D'Or at Cannes. (providing that my character is played by Penelope Cruz)

Oh, btw, guess who's doing 80 swimming laps tomorrow.  The androgynous 20 year old with the self-indulgent blog;  same one who ate Mongolian stir fry and Cold Stone ice cream on the same night!  I hope it was worth it.  

the good atheist and the ex-Pat

I'm taking a World Religions class, as part of my humanities requirement.  The class itinerary, by itself, is brilliant.  We'll be covering most of the major religions and there's even going to be an in-depth research project with field trips and power-points.  'This is cool,' I tell myself.  

Unfortunately, the more-vocal individuals in the class, have taken it upon themselves to nitpick certain points of religious worship.  I'll assume they are atheist.  Takes one to know one.  As an atheist, myself, it's upsetting.  That form of condescension is backwards-thinking and counter-productive, especially when they've dished out $300 for a class that stresses 'humanities.'  (joke's on them)  Anyways, I'm certain they're a decent lot.  I don't know their situation.  Maybe one of their family members were killed by an extremist zealot or maybe they were forced to do the rosary after every confession by their orthodox Catholic parents.  

On a lighter, note, do you see that pic on top?  That's my dream home, Singapore.  Authentic Indian curry, popiah, kopi tiams.  Food aside, the city has a strict policy on gum & littering (a fine of $2000 USD *ouch*) and exceptional, liberal research labs. (Bioplis)  The primary language is English and Mandarin. (gotta learn the latter and master the former)  After earning my doctorate, look for me in Singapore. (presumably 200 pounds heavier and very, very happy)

I'm going to take it easy and enjoy the rest of the weekend.  Cheers! :)  

Zum Wohl! Ja! Ja! Ja!

Drinking and deadlines don't mix, unless that drink happens to be a can of Monster.  I was very productive today: I finished all of the calc homework assigned for this week, reviewed for my upcoming exam, did my postings on the english class's bulletin board.  If I was my own parent, I would give myself a pat on the back.  Kind of like a prokaryote, you know, since they produce asexually ala binary fission.  Never mind that last bit. 

catering to the masses like it was 1984

Like a lark, I put up my blog, as part of the requirements for my English class.  Really, I could have easily set up a new blog, one with deep, eloquent NY TImes Editorial-esque rants and politically conservative (yet tolerant, emphasis on the tolerant) views.  It would be insightful, moving, but no one would read it, not even I.   

To the professors who are reading:

Unlike the majority of things I've done, this is one of the few intrinsic projects I've participated in.  I'll play nice and do the assignments.  However, keep in mind that adhering to certain regulations and the looming threat of censorship (during this day and age) will make Orwell turn in the grave.  You're a wonderful lot and I'm looking forward to this quarter.  Anything class related will be tagged E101. (makes the mess easier to sift through)

Oh, that was fun.  A little passive rebellion never hurt anyone. (or did anything)  Better than that incident with post-it notes, at least.  The day started out on the wrong foot. (for us left-handers, it would be the RIGHT foot)  I had my gym bag meticulously prepared the day before, but I  had forgotten to wear my running sneakers.  Instead, my feet were donned with a $14 pair of Tote (yeah, the umbrella company) water-proof shoes.

fluorescent lights are unrelenting

Regardless of how aesthetically pleasing they may be, I hate fluorescent lights. Bah, they are everywhere.  I'll just have to get use to them. 

I have some studying to do, so busy yourself by perusing 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People' by Covey.  It's the lite version, but I'm sure you can find torrents of this anywhere. (NOT THAT YOU SHOULD! **wink** **wink** **nudge** **nudge**)     

gtd applications & mall adventure

With classes starting on the 7th, I've been demoing various GTD applications.  After a hour of downloading, various fiddling and deleting, I've finally decided on my Mac's iCal app. (it all comes fullcircle, I'm sorry to have doubted you, iCal)  For those who are using PCs or Linux, try Thinking Rock.  It's a nifty project planner/thought organizer.  The most difficult part of planning is differentiating what you need to do with what you really need to do.  GTD isn't a cure-all for procrastinators, more of a idea-categorizer.  (ex: studying=high priority, buying a life-size replica of Hugh Laurie for 'extra-curricular activity'= higher priority)

Cleaned up, wore my best dress shirt I bought from Banana Republic, put on my freshly ironed pants and went to the mall. (<--idiot)  Aside from the pool, running trail and campus, I rarely go out.  (Oh hey, now, don't judge me!)  

I had lunch at a Japanese rotating-conveyer belt restaurant. (^ see pic)  The atmosphere was very urban; the projector played clips of various city life in Japan, presumably to keep the waiting foodies occupied.  Food was unsurprisingly inexpensive.  (I grabbed mostly the lower-end plates)  Today, I ignored my vegetarian inclinations and tried the various sushi & katsu dishes. It was... okay.  If you live near a Blue C Sushi or you don't have any other decent sushi place within a 50 mile radius, go ahead and try it.  (Personally, I preferred the Korean-owned Japanese restaurant near my place; portions were larger (tad more expensive) and they give me extra scoops of green-tea ice cream.)

Later, I shuffled around the mall and stopped at the Borders store.  

Borders Books inspired haiku:

Books everywhere

Pretentious urban beatnik

amazon dot com

i reek of recluse

Having had my fill of pizza, my skin practically reeks of it.  (<--See shiny forehead)  Aside from that little bit 'o  news, nothing new.  I've been entertaining myself (Ha!) with a game called CDX.  Anyone interested in Roman history or net-gaming should definitely take a click.  Speaking of net-stuff with interactive stories, check out Luc Jacamon & Matz's 'The Killer,' an unconventional take on an assassin's perspective. News on the web tells me that 'The Killer' will be adapted into a movie and will be directed by some guy.  You know, the same guy who directed that movie with the club that involved fighting and the homo-erotic overtones.  Oh, gods, what was the title?  Club Fight?